Group Shadow

We embark on our spiritual growth with journeys into the Light.  There is the wonderful excitement of doing techniques, of new information and understanding and most significantly of meeting and sharing with like-minded people.  There is a cause, an ideal, a sense of purpose and significance — we’re going to fix things, we’re going to ‘save the world’, save the universe no less.  Then there is a crisis.  The unexpected happens and things go off the rails. Is this failure?  What’s going on?  

Failure is a matter of perspective.

Right now, we are moving between two major states of consciousness.  We have our normal 3D consciousness, as a Personality or incarnate walking around in a physical body.  With the coming of the ‘Fifth World’, talked about in many systems, we’re coming into more direct relationship with our Souls and are integrating Soul consciousness. This includes consciousness associated with dimensions 4, 5 & 6 and particularly D5 and its Amenti frequencies and encryptions.  This integrates 6D consciousness.

It’s important to note that Soul is a much more expanded consciousness than Personality.  It’s a group consciousness, embracing a family of personalities.  The perspective is more group oriented, ‘big picture’, strategic and long term.

What may appear as failure at a Personality level isn’t necessarily failure for Soul.  It may simply be a lesson or experience we need to go through to resolve something.  It may even have been orchestrated to a degree by our Soul.

When we go into the Light, we often get a high, a rush or feel good factor.  We naturally want to preserve this and remain entirely ‘in the Light’.  However, Light is still a polarity and exists in relation with its opposite or Shadow. Working with Light brings Shadow into focus.  This then becomes something we need to navigate or deal with.  This entails facing challenges, issues and difficulties and working to heal, resolve and integrate them.  This is where the real hard work arises that is crucial to spiritual growth and progress.  To an extent, it is the price we pay for growth and the highs.

In effect, we do our spiritual training and learning in the Light.  Then come the tests where we get to practice what we’ve learned. It’s like going to school to learn the theory and then being chucked out into the world to apply it.  We’ve experienced the Light.  Now let’s see how we cope with darkness, our individual and collective Shadow.

In the following I wish to make clear that it is not intended to target anybody.  The intention is to focus on issues.  It is also a journey within myself, to clarify and resolve issues arising both internally and externally, to the extent possible at this time.  It’s shared in that spirit.


We’re all trying to move in the same general direction.  We’re all doing the best we can, the best we know how, in our circumstances.  We all mean well.  Yet, there’s a tension, a rift or split and a degree of conflict in the group.  How did this arise?

We can point fingers, allocate blame and so on.  But that hasn’t done much to resolve issues. There are many layers to these situations.  There are front line players at the most visible level. But there are also levels of influence feeding into the situation.  There are higher dimensional / off planet influences and there are influences feeding in from the group consciousness.  When watching a Punch & Judy show we get a more complete picture of what’s happening, by also watching those pulling the strings.

There is a classic process for orchestrating conflict.  It’s good to be aware of this, to learn to cope with it.  The key elements can be summarised as follows:

  • Branding:  This is a process of building an identity for something.  It involves attaching identifiers like names/labels, color, symbols and characteristics like roles, uses, what it is and so on.  Branding is a normal activity, widely used for products, services, groups, e.g. sports teams, companies and so on.  It only becomes a problem when branding is used negatively.  This happens, for example, when it is used to divide or factionalise groups.
  • De-humanisation:  Normally, people get along and won’t intentionally harm each other.  To bring groups into conflict requires a degree of de-sensitising.  Negative traits are ascribed to and amplified for a target group.  Condemnation is whipped up to justify treating them badly.  There was a classic example of this on the Western Front in World War I.  There was a ceasefire for Christmas Day 1914.  Soldiers in some of the trenches began singing Christmas carols.  The soldiers in opposing trenches started singing along with them.  Then they began sticking their heads out of the trenches, slowly coming out to mingle.  Before long they were mingling in no-man’s land, sharing their rations in celebration, swapping stories about their families.  They spent the day, having fun, kicking football and doing what people normally do, i.e. being human.  Military leaders on both sides were furious about this.  They re-imposed discipline and it was back to the business of war and shooting the following day.
  • Demonization:  This is a further stage of negative conditioning, to tear down opponents. They are so ‘bad’ that action against them is not only justified but needed.  This is used widely in politics, for example, to vilify communists / capitalists, ethnic groups like Jews in WW II, Muslims, immigrants and so on.  The problem with demonization, however, is that it creates demons that come back to haunt us.
  •  Scape-Goating:  Problems and woes are dumped on targets and these are driven out of the group, to punish them and allegedly get rid of the problems.  A classic scape-goating ritual is throwing stones.  A major benefit for those doing the scape-goating is that it rallies support round them.  People gather round to avoid being scape-goated themselves.  It gets rid of internal challenges and deflects issues and attention outwards.

Differences are normal in life and these can escalate to varying degrees of conflict.  Handled well, conflict can break down problems, move things along and we can learn a lot in the process. Avoiding de-humanisation is a key factor in preventing stuck conflict.  When we see someone, we can see a human being, more than a label, a brand, a color, a role or whatever.


Within any group there are communal issues that are of group concern and there are personal / private issues that aren’t.  A marriage breakdown and divorce is a very intense event between two people. It is mostly private between the people involved but there can be some wider impact.  A Speaker divorce got thrust widely into the public domain.  Details get pored over from time to time and judgments are being made.

A divorce is a traumatic event.  Issues, details and their perception will naturally vary between sides.  If there was no disagreement, there would be no need for a contested divorce.  There is a lot of pain involved, mixed emotions, differing views, contention over assets and so on.  It is not a process one would wish for anyone.

The people qualified to probe details, assess issues and make judgments are the neutral qualified legal professionals assigned to oversee the divorce proceedings.  This process was gone through and completed, and an agreement signed in mid-2014.  The outcome was documented in the agreement that was publicised at the time.  There is no need to re-run the case and second guess the outcome.

Personal issues and details are the responsibility of the people involved.  It makes sense to ring-fence personal issues and leave them, where they belong.

There is one issue outstanding, however.  In May 2012 one side of the divorce situation was publicised and spread widely around the internet, without an opportunity to hear the other side. Natural justice requires that the other side be heard also, regardless of whether we agree or disagree with it.  In this context, I very much disagree with suppressing ASaN’s interview.

I am a friend of ASaN.  In saying that I am not against E’Asha.  I have told ASaN a number of times I wish I could help E’Asha.  My disagreements relate to specific issues, not the person.

I have seen immense hurt, pain, suffering and dislocation in ASaN’s life.  I’m sure there’s pain on all sides impacted.  What started out as a divorce escalated into a much wider and damaging rift that is still reverberating through the collective.  For ASaN, apart from a difficult divorce and a major life re-orientation, there is, in this situation, the additional trauma of a major and very public character attack, with the resulting pain of rejection, of having former friends and colleagues turn their backs, even run out of shops on sight.  There is the questioning, the requests to justify oneself, the judgment and so on.  Yet, despite all this, ASaN is sitting on and holding frequency in one of the major planetary grid sites.  He is on the job.

ASaN’s interview is very authentic to experience, painfully so.  It is no harm for people to see some of the pain, frustration and even anger from a real-life experience.  It isn’t easy to expose oneself in such a vulnerable situation.

The Speakers generally have come under enormous pressure.  They are recovering from personal crises, in various ways.  They are facing questions, judgment, expectations that they conform to how we think things should be, attempts to pin responsibility and so on.

They are human beings.  They have relatively little capacity to manoeuvre in the present situation.

We can discuss and theorize about the situation, but we can never really know what it has been and is like for the principals involved.  They have their own processes to go through, in their own way.  The best we can do is to be available in support, as appropriate.

This whole mission is a group endeavour.  There is a shared group responsibility.  The group consciousness has a key role to play in outcomes.  We are all responsible for this.  We can argue details until doomsday, but it takes a shift in consciousness to really move things along.  We have more power than we may realize.  The people in the middle have the most flexibility and can impact things, by holding frequency and neutral space, by building bridges and facilitating healing and greater communication throughout the collective.

Violet Shield

In late 2011 and more particularly 2012 a new arrangement of shields emerged, and various people were allotted to the blue / white core, green / gold and violet shields.  In May 2012 and subsequently it was claimed that the violet and green shields would shatter in October 2012, with dire consequences for the associated people.  October 2012 passed, and nothing happened, nothing at all.

The sun continued to rise in the morning and set in the evening, as usual.  There was no unusual earthquake activity nor major grid events. Nobody grew horns nor started howling at the moon. Nobody slunk away into a sad little corner to eke out their days in misery.  The worst that happened to anybody was a fall into common sense and hurray for that.  Mostly, people stepped into their power, got on with their lives and are the stronger for it.

Is this not cause for relief, for joy and celebration, for dancing in the aisles?

It’s disappointing to see the violet shield still being raised from time to time, as being the source and cause of various problems.  Basically, these shields were a branding exercise to differentiate groups, so they could be dealt with in different ways.  A shield is a collective of consciousness working together for a particular purpose.  The original Christos Realignment Mission (CRM) team was a singular shield of Indigos with 3 Flame Holders (Blue, Gold & Violet) and supporting Flame Keepers.  Separate shields didn’t arise.  The separation of shields is artificial.

Indigos are ‘Rainbow Wearers’ and, in principle, can run a spectrum of currents and colors. They’re not confined to any one color, even though they may run a particular current, to meet certain needs.  For example, the leader of the so called ‘Violet Shield’ is the backup Blue Flame Holder, a ‘true Blue’.  Many Indigos can run the Primal Sound currents to a degree.  These are largely beyond dimensionalisation, color, in the sense of light, and so on.


What does ‘Fall’ mean?  I fell asleep last night and have been doing so for more than 60 years and am none the worse for the experience.  I have fallen off bicycles, ladders and so on many times and lived to tell the tale.  We have all dropped bodies, let them fall away, more times than we care to remember, but are still alive, conscious and present.

Fall is a relative thing.  Basically, it’s a drop in frequency.  There are certain parts capable of holding connection than can rise up the dimensional scale and integrate fully with our core consciousness in Source or Self.  There are other parts that cannot make the journey home in this way.  They need to return by a process of dissolution.  Looking at the dimensional scale in the first diagram above (page 1), we can see, where the D12 connection is intact on the Kathara Grid side of the diagram, that there is a direct pathway upwards all the way back to Source.  On the Tree of Life side of the diagram 11 dimensions are severed, in the red box.  There is a split there that hinders direct connection upwards.  Energies there, such as shadow influences, need to heal for direct return home.  What cannot heal needs to dissolve to release trapped consciousness for indirect return to Source.  This is less than ideal but still better than being trapped permanently in form.

We all have parts that can go up, some that need to heal before they can go up and others that need to go down.

When we look at a person we focus on the physical embodiment.  But this doesn’t represent the totality of who a person really is, in terms of their soul family, higher consciousness levels and Source connection.  We’re only seeing the tip of an iceberg.  It’s worth noting also that darkness, where it can integrate with its light polarity, can return to Source directly.  The problem is with stuck darkness. Light can also get stuck.

Any person is potentially an infinite being.  We’re not in any position to judge their value or potential.  Even if we were so capable, it’s not our job to do so.  Where they are going is their responsibility.  What we can judge is what is projected into and affects the group —behaviour, actions, attitudes and so on.  If someone is breathing and alive that’s a vote of confidence from the great Livestream in that particular life.  That doesn’t mean that we have to accept their behaviour or that we may not have to reflect consequences back to them.

The bottom line is to deal with Behaviour and not judge the Person.  This is a fundamental precept in many spiritual traditions.  We don’t have to worry about fallen people or groups, only fallen behaviour.  When we focus specifically on behaviour things can look very different.

The ‘Violet Shield’ is simply a group of people.  All are doing fine.  Where is the fallen behaviour? It’s meaningless and a deflection from more real problems, to be going on about such shields .

Personal Factors

Disagreements and conflict arise routinely in normal business and work situations.  These have to get resolved for business to succeed.  A fundamental principle is to separate out personal factors and focus on issues.  Personal attachment to roles, projects, information and outcomes colors and complicates issues, making them harder to resolve.  People can get hurt.  There is a lot of energy and time wasted in contention.  There is a need for professional detachment, so that issues can be looked at in a more neutral way, leading to better outcomes.

In a work environment, it’s easier to separate work and personal factors, i.e. one’s personal life. There’s much more personal engagement in spiritual and personal development.  But there is still a need for separation.

When there is strong personal identification with roles, for example, raising issues with the role can be perceived as personal attack.  This means that the issues don’t get addressed properly and problems persist.  Likewise, when there is personal identification with knowledge, information, perspectives or projects, raising issues can cause people to retreat into defensive positions, around hurt feelings or a sense of victimisation, and fail to deal with issues.   Again, problems can fail to get resolved.

The Four Agreements, which E’Asha has mentioned, are very helpful:

  • Be Impeccable with your Word.
  • Don’t take anything Personally.
  • Don’t make Assumptions.
  • Always do your Best.

When we take things too personally, we get hurt.  A lot of energy goes into processing these feelings and this can be exhausting.  It can be difficult not to take things personally.  It’s a learning process and I struggle a lot with this.  Personal factors are generally the responsibility of the person or group of people immediately involved.  Issues, such as behaviour, actions, attitudes and so on that affect the group are our collective responsibility and we have a responsibility to deal with these.

The bottom line is that —  It isn’t Personal. Focus on Issues not People.

In 3D, we perceive from a personal perspective and tend to bring everything back to this perspective. We also project a personal perspective onto situations and life around us.  For example, when relating to Divinity, we tend to personify it as a personal being or God watching over creation, the old bearded man in the sky.  Likewise, we personify evil as demons or the Devil.

The 5/6D Soul perspective is quite different.  Soul integrates and transcends personality and has a more collective / big picture perspective.  It deals in Archetypes.  Soul and archetype are closely related.  From a Soul perspective personalities aren’t that important.  They can simply be chapters in a bigger story, experiences consciousness passes through, like a role we play or a suit of clothes we wear for a time.  The Personality perspective is more limited and sees itself as very important; the Soul much less so.

Soul is more interested in outcomes than in who does what.  Soul focuses less on who is right and more on what is right.  It’s not a question of which ‘side’ is right or wrong, more what is right / wrong.  This changes the situation significantly.  The focus is more on behaviour and outcomes than on persons or sides.

Principles, such as Truth, Integrity, Realism, Fairness / Justice, Kindness and so on, play a major role.  There will be right and wrong on both sides.  The focus shifts from alignment with sides to alignment with principles, to be on the side of Truth, for example.  Discerning principles and influences in a situation is much tougher than picking a ‘side’, but is much more productive.


The personification of evil raises some issues.  When working with techniques and the Light generally we wish to associate only with Light.  We tend to think that any negative or shadow issues are getting sorted and push them outside ourselves.  We tend to personify shadow and project it onto targets like the Illuminati, the Cabal, Shadow Government, Thoth and so on.  There are issues with such as these, but where are they getting their power from?  We are giving them some of our power and in doing so we are dis-empowering ourselves.

An influence like Thoth is more a state of consciousness than an identifiable person.  It is spread widely in the collective unconscious. It can be strongly present in individuals but is not confined to them.  We can all have an element of this consciousness in our personal shadow.  When we project such shadow, we not only miss an opportunity to heal it.  We also lose control of it.  What we project by way of demonization can come back to haunt us, as unresolved shadow.

As Carl Jung said – “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”


Unsubstantiated rumour can have a damaging effect in a group.

Shortly after the May 2012 workshop a document was publicised on June 7th entitled —QUESTION ABOUT LAST WORKSHOP REVELATION.  I apologise for raising this, as it’s generally better not to re-open old wounds.  But there are relevant points to be made and some of the effects are still moving through the Shield.  This document made a number of increasingly bizarre claims, under the umbrella of AMCC authority.  There were general allegations of a conspiracy to edit information out of workshops / block all AMCC transmissions.

It’s worth noting that the use of shock / horror language and images (incubi, succubi, dark flowering, etc.) needs to be treated with care.  It has the effect of shocking people out of their rational mind and dragging down into gut emotional / sub-conscious reactions, which are easier to influence or are more vulnerable to manipulation.  It’s good to stand back, let initial reactions subside, then review with a more conscious detached perspective and check the facts.  Ironically also, what influence oversaw KS information falling out of circulation and actual attempts to re-edit workshop recordings?

The allegations in the document mentioned above quickly morphed into rumours that people were modifying KS products and these rumours spread like wild fire round the group.  There were further rumours that Azurite Press (AP) Office products were somehow corrupt or bad, had bad vibes or whatever.  This created chaos and severely damaged AP.  Naturally customers were upset.  There were queries about what on earth was going on, were products people had already bought okay, how could people be sure that products they were going to buy were okay and so on.  Some orders were cancelled.

The offices came under severe strain trying to cope, trying to figure out for themselves what was going on, to reassure people and to try to calm the situation.  Eventually lawyers took control and moved to impose discipline and prevent defamatory claims.  E’Asha issued a public statement that AP products were okay.  The situation calmed down, but a lot of damage had already been done and some of the underlying problems remained.

In reality, after May 2012 there was general chaos and bewilderment.  Nobody was in charge.  People were totally occupied trying to figure out what had happened, what was going on, how to proceed and how to cope with all the issues and queries that were milling round.  Also, coping with their own reactions.  It was day to day survival. Nobody had time to conspire or even think about it!

Allegations of tampering with the products were false, deeply offensive and damaging.  There was only one person with the technical resources to modify video and workshop recordings.  He worked long hours after each workshop for very modest income, to compile the raw recordings into finished products.  He worked assiduously to produce faithful renditions.  Finished products were passed to and approved by the Speakers prior to release.  There was no tampering.

This person was deeply hurt by the allegations.  Also his role and work were cast aside without a word of acknowledgment or appreciation.  He also had to reorganise his life and income.  He was upset, even furious, with his treatment and legitimately so.

It’s important to realise that there has been upheaval, dislocation and pain, even anger, involved for people in this whole situation.  I’m angry.  But anger can be a fire that burns.  The challenge is to convert it to a passion in action.

Some years later this issue surfaced again.  A member of Core team started dissing ASaN and Mac personally.  He claimed in effect that E’Asha’s line had discouraged her from looking at the earlier workshops, as she would be too upset by the way ASaN had modified them.  Regardless of where this came from , this was false, utter nonsense.  ASaN was not involved with the video processing.  The only role was for Ash & ASaN to sign off on the finished product.  Workshops were not re-edited.  That would have been very difficult to do in practice and would have been obvious.  These claims had to be and were pushed back against, at the time.

It isn’t so much people who will de-rail the Freedom Teachings.  It is behaviour, falsities, shadow influences, confusion, mis-understanding, lack of communication, drifting from principles, drifting from the spirit and essence of Teachings and so on.

Rumour has a dramatic appeal and can be very powerful.  It’s also a loose cannon.  It travels unpredictably.  When set in motion it’s very hard to rein in.  It’s wide open to influence, particularly shadow influence, settling of old scores, grievances and so on.  It can change as it spreads, with people adding their own interpretations and twists.

Where an issue arises, the ideal is to bring it to the people involved, who can fix it, in a way that moves towards a solution.  This isn’t always easy or even possible.  A problem with rumour is that it often moves away from the people involved, e.g. behind their backs, where they can’t do much about it.  There can also be a lack of accountability, in terms of people taking responsibility for what they are saying.  This causes damage, mistrust and failure to resolve issues.

We’re all in a confusing situation and it’s understandable that people want information.  Nobody has all the facts, as there appear to be higher dimensional influences in play.

The quality of information is important. We can have:

  • Facts.
  • Claims, which could be true but need to be verified.
  • Opinions, personal interpretation or perceptions.
  • Misunderstanding or misperceptions,
  • Gossip, innuendo.
  • Propaganda.
  • Grievances, settling of scores.
  • Falsities.

It is of value to assess information as best we can, checking what can be checked.  Often, we don’t have as much information or answers, as we would like.  In that case we can fall back on Principles and Values for guidance.  The process of working through a situation can be more valuable than the answers themselves.  A helpful guide, for example, are the precepts for mindful speech:

  • Is it True?
  • Is it Necessary?
  • Is it Kind? 

More generally, having similar information coming from different directions doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s either right or wrong. It can be coming from a common source, via different channels.  Equally, having a common source doesn’t necessarily mean that something is right or wrong.  It still needs to be checked on its own merits. 


Another issue arising from the document mentioned above is that of Lines and, more generally, our inner connections. It’s wonderful to go within and connect with our higher consciousness, our Soul Family and our inspiration. It’s so valuable to cultivate this connection.  However, in going within, it’s also necessary to be aware that we are also entering the domain of our sub-conscious and its shadow influences.  This is illustrated in the diagram over. 

As we work with techniques and with the Light generally our connections grow stronger.  We have increasing confidence in them and can think problems and negativity are falling away.  That there’s nothing the Light cannot deal with.  We can think that any negativity that comes up doesn’t belong and that we can cast it out, e.g.  by way of projection.

Unfortunately, that’s not how shadow works.  Rather than being cast out, shadow needs to be brought into the Light and transmuted through the Light, to release it.  Shadow needn’t be a problem, when dealt with in a realistic way, on an ongoing basis.  But it can become a problem through neglect.  Shadow management is a key part of spiritual growth.

As we draw in more Light, we also bring more shadow into focus, as it too reaches for the Light and the opportunities it presents.  Just as Soul holds conscious connection to higher levels and other Soul influences, shadow also holds connection to the collective unconscious and group shadow influences.

So, when we draw inner perceptions from higher levels, these also have to pass through the shadow lands.  Being aware of the potential for contamination and actually checking is a protection against contamination.  When we speak from a space of inner perception it’s good to know who’s holding the microphone.  Is it the Soul Angel or Shadow Monkey, or some combination of both?

What we perceive is obviously colored by our perceptions, filters and so on.  We down-step inner perception into our normal conscious landscape.  Separating Soul and shadow influences can be tricky and is very difficult to do solely within our inner space.  Outer reality comes to the rescue here.

We are highly creative in our inner space.  We can conceive of many possibilities and can choose to explore their expression, by projecting them into creation.  Outer reality then takes these projections and reflects them back to us, via the Law of Consequence.  The effects of our actions come back to us, e.g. the Law of Karma.

So we can check what is coming through us by seeing how it travels out in the world and what effects come back from it.  Does it do what we expect or claim and if it doesn’t what does that tell us? This is Reality Checking.

So, we have two Lines — the obvious inner one and the outer one, i.e. facts and feedback from the real world.  Balancing these Lines gives us much more reliable information.  It’s like a tree. In order to grow strong branches up into the sky, a tree also has to put down deep roots in the earth. The two complement each other.

Rather than blindly trusting a line, it’s good to be aware of the potential for contamination and to check both internally and externally, via fact and reality checking.  This builds a safer and stronger line over time and helps to preserve its integrity.  We can take what comes to us internally.  We can reality check it by checking facts, where possible, and seeing how it travels in the real world. What comes back?  We can bring the two streams together for a more balanced determination and then take responsibility for this.  It’s important also not to give our power away to lines nor to influences.  If we do so we can lose the ability and detachment to check a line properly.

A particular issue with lines is personal detachment.  If we identify too personally with a line our personal factors can subtly come to use the line, to fulfil personal wishes and needs.  We can tend to hear what we want to hear (confirmation bias) and give more attention to what suits our purpose and personal wishes and needs.  When we’re bought into a line, we have a vested interest in it and become less able to evaluate it in a detached way.  We are then more vulnerable to being hooked by shadow influences.

In the earlier KS materials, Ashayana used urge caution in using lines.  We were advised to beware of ‘ego-pats’.  These are influences than lead us on by appealing to our vanity, telling us how important or special we are.  There can be a tendency to come back for more ego stroking and to be ‘led up the garden path’.

Higher dimensional connections and lines can be very hard and exhausting on the body.  The amount of high-quality information Ash brought through is phenomenal and worthy of great respect and appreciation.

Reality Check

In practice, our inner and outer realities are closely coupled and highly intertwined.  They mirror each other.  If we want to see what’s in our inner reality, look at its impact in the outer world.  If we wish to know our outer reality, look to its inner causes.

In this context, knocking outer reality is dangerous.  Describing it as fallen, unworthy or irrelevant is also effectively denying the Law of Cause & Effect.  It can be an attempt to escape effects and responsibility for them. It can allow undesirable effects to be dismissed as coming from a defective world, rather than something we’re responsible for and may have to deal with.  It can also disempower us. If we become too detached from the world, while still living in the world, we fail to learn or adapt to feedback and become less effective in the world.

Ignoring the real world in favour of an inner ideal doesn’t mean that issues go away or get solved by themselves.  The Law of Consequence grinds on regardless. Issues and challenges can lie in wait for as long as it takes and can come crashing back ever more strongly demanding attention.

It’s worth noting that world population trends predict that 90 — 95% of the new babies born into the world over the next several decades will be born in developing countries.  Some 60% of new babies will be born in Africa. Life in developing countries can be very raw, real and grounding.  It can also be more natural and protected from the influences of technology.  What better way to get back in touch with reality and ground again?

Living in developed countries is a privilege.  The world can have wonderful opportunities.  These privileges need to be shared around.  Other incoming Souls need to get their chance at these opportunities.  It’s worthwhile to make the most of what we have while we have it and to resolve what we can while we can.


Interacting with the real world provides invaluable information, by mirroring effects back to us.  We can also benefit from this by doing our own mirroring.  We can hold a mirror up to our actions, by switching roles with the person on the receiving end.  What would it be like to be on the receiving end of what I am doing or saying?  Am I comfortable with that?  If not, what do I need to change, to be more comfortable with the situation?  We may still need to act.  But it can reduce undesirable or unintended side effects.

If we don’t do this mirroring it will be done for us.  The consequences of actions, good or bad, will come back.  A football game, for example, has two halves.  One team has the advantage of playing with the wind in the first half.  At half time, they swap around, and the other team gets the advantage.  Over time we get to experience both sides of situations, for more complete learning and resolution.  We get to play many roles in the drama.


Another issue is the targeting of people. In the aftermath of May 2012 rumours came at me from many directions that I was supposed to be a re-embodiment of J9.  People sourcing the rumours never said anything directly to me and it didn’t surface publicly.  There was just an indirect allusion in the document referenced above.  So there was nothing I could get hold of, to address the issue directly.  Also, there were references at the time to J9 having a twin.  I presume Rose and myself were being auditioned behind our backs for roles as the ‘Evil Twins’ in the modified Christmas Story.

I would be highly flattered if the J9 connection were actually true.  Fame at last!  At the time there was a global eucharistic congress of Catholics here in Dublin.  I could have put on a robe, a pair of sandals and grown a beard.  I could have gone into the assembly and announced — “Hi, I’m Jesus. You may kiss the hem of my garment”!  I could have had a great time and be made for life.  Alas, it wasn’t to be.  I’m no more J9, than I am Cleopatra, Julius Caesar or George Washington.

Also, the way J9 has been vilified in the modified Christmas Story is itself inaccurate and quite inappropriate.  It differs significantly from the original version in Voyagers II and the original Christmas Story.  There are some interdimensional politics playing out there.

I do have some memory from a shared consciousness in the Christ times.  It was as a young boy. I remember scenes playing with another kid on the edge of crowds of people, gathering to listen to a preacher.  We used throw pebbles at people passing by and then hide behind bushes, when they shouted at us. In other words, I was a bratty kid.  There’s also a memory of having an older teenage sister, who used go out to meetings some evenings.  I used hold onto her robe begging her to bring me with her, which she sometimes did.

There are some memories of seeing a tall dark-haired man in crowds and in rooms, whom I presume was J9.  The impression is of a strong, somewhat brash, very charismatic personality, who enjoyed being in front of people and had presence and impact.  The impression of J12 is of a quieter, more sensitive individual, who struggled a bit with being in the world, with dealing with the public and so on.  But events in Palestine largely passed me by.

There is a memory of travelling to the south of France, as a teenager.  It wasn’t with the earlier J9 group that travelled there, but sometime later.  There was commerce then from the eastern Mediterranean region with the south of France and many Jewish groups had settled there.  I have a lot of familiarity with that region not only from that life, but from many prior and subsequent ones. There was limited contact with J9, but more with the group that collected around Marahari / Mary Magdalene.

I subsequently heard that other people had also been fingered for the honor of the J9 role, including Ashayana / E’Asha’s husband prior to ASaN.

As far as I’m concerned, any such targeting is nonsense and I don’t take it seriously.  The source of such targeting would generally be from higher dimensional influences.  In a sense, it’s an indirect compliment, a badge of honor, to be worthy of targeting.  However, we haven’t been affected too badly.  Other people have been through much more serious dislocation.

None of us is perfect.  We all have stuff to sort out.  I have more than enough shadow issues and so on to deal with, to keep me busy for a long time.  I’m happy to deal with real issues, where things can be improved, but not to waste time on nonsense.

Gender Polarity

There are obvious differences between women and men.  These and their co-creative interaction can enrich life greatly.  They also provide different perspectives, which can on occasion lead to difficulties.  It can help to get some insight on gender polarity.

Many traditions describe how gender polarity alternates between dimensional levels.  One way of looking at it is illustrated in the diagram below.  EirA is the magnetic, receptive, inner directed, feminine polarity and ManA the electric, expressive, outer directed, masculine complement.  These polarities interact co-creatively and alternate up the dimensional scale.  So women are physically EirA, emotionally ManA, mentally EirA, astrally ManA and so on.  It is the opposite for men.  Women are ManA and projecting energy in the even dimensions and men in the odd dimensions. 

In challenging situations, we tend to retreat into our comfort zones or strongholds, where we can operate most readily from.  Men tend to retreat into mental & physical spaces and women into emotional & astral spaces, where they can operate most powerfully from.

In general terms, this can lead to different perspectives, mis-understanding and talking at cross purposes.  Under pressure, both sides may not appreciate the strength of the power being projected, its impact and the difficulty handling that on the receiving end.  Both sides can feel dominated and victimised, from different perspectives.  Allowance for the differences can help reduce mis­understanding and escalation of problems.

Gender isn’t as black and white as it may seem.  Even within a dimensional level the division may not be as sharp as indicated, but more of a sliding scale between the two extremes.  Genders are tightly interwoven, and we get to experience both polarities, in different ways.  Also, with greater freedom to move consciousness between levels, gender becomes more fluid.  There is also the ManU level that progressively integrates and supersedes both polarities. 


Coming into KS in 2001, if I had known what lay on all stages of the journey, would I have gone ahead.  Personally, I would have run for the hills.  But Soul says all stages of the journey are needed, particularly the challenges.  Personally, I hate conflict and will go to great lengths to avoid it.  But Soul blocks the escape routes one by one until the only way left is to work through it.

Challenges can be difficult to deal with.  We like to see the path of spiritual growth and development strewn with roses and sunshine, angels playing harps on pink clouds and perpetual ease and harmony.  The problem is that we may have to climb mountains to get there.  The quickening of growth and rising frequency accelerates the pace and intensity of onrushing challenges.

We can try to insulate ourselves, finding shelter and safe zones behind walls.  Sometimes such shelter is the sanest and most realistic option.  But it can also isolate us from formative influences, from the challenges that really stretch our spiritual muscles.  Sometimes we may be pushed out of our comfort zones.  Ultimately, it often comes down to a balance between nurture and challenge.

Parents rearing children often face this dilemma.  We wish to protect children, but if we over shield them, they can fail to develop real life survival skills.  We can be doing them a dis-service. Soul is like a parent consciousness.  It pitches us into challenges, to rub off our corners and polish the diamond.  For example, Life is pitching large numbers of babies into challenging environments in developing countries, where most of them learn to survive.

We needn’t worry too much about protecting people.  Being exposed to issues and problems can be a learning experience.  Also, we need to beware of protecting children and people from the consequences of action.  Parents often have to let kids feel the effects of their actions.  We don’t have to fix all problems.  Ultimately, the Law of Consequence will resolve everything, one way or another.  But sometimes this Law may need to work through agencies or people, like law courts and so on.

Division and boundaries can lead to poor communication, mis-understanding, tension and loss of opportunity for co-operation, sharing and learning.  Engagement and communication help reduce this.  It Is the middle ground that is more fluid and that has the greatest potential for movement.  We have all shared this journey in various ways and are in this endeavour together.  We can bring different perspectives and capabilities to the table, to contribute to an enterprise that is bigger than any of us can envision or accomplish alone.  It’s not just a case of reaching out within KS, but across all groups and individuals committed to evolution.  We can all stand in our power and do what we can for the greater good across the widest front.

May we be AWAKE, AWARE and ABLE!